It’s the last gasp of Leo season, folks, and Jennifer Lopez is one hunky, long-haired lion who isn’t going gently into that good night.
In the storied history of Leos being Leos, a few moments stand out as shining testaments to the dramatic archetype of this fixed fire sign: Madonna’s 2012 Superbowl halftime performance; Napoleon Bonaparte every day of his life; Slash keeping a mountain lion as a pet; Kylie Jenner wearing a lion’s head; Mick Jagger marries Bianca because she looked like him; Stanley Kubrick writes a 15-page manual on how to care for his pet cat; and Whitney Houston playing Brandy’s fairy godmother in a “Cinderella” adaptation.
And now Jennifer Lopez has added a new crown jewel to that junk box by filing for divorce from Ben Affleck on what would have been their second wedding anniversary.
J.Lo reportedly wanted the news to “sink in.”
Well, duh. Leo is equally oxygenated by attention and drama, often using the latter to provide the former.
As a refresher, Jennifer Lopez was delivered to us on July 24, 1969, making our daughter a “love me, love me, tell me you love me” Leo sun with a cobweb and conspiracy theory Scorpio moon.
Rulers of the fifth house of pleasure, romance, and gambling, Leos love to play, but they also play to win—and when forced to lose, no sign suffers failure more deeply or takes rejection more personally.
Watch Lopez reveal she felt like she was “going to die” after calling off her first engagement to Affleck and, in this latest split, going full tilt and all the mane in it. dolce vita as a motive for revenge.
In a world that demands we be less, Lopez’s extra is downright aspirational.
Since the couple first sparked breakup rumors last spring, Lopez has been living it up for the hungry public eye, wearing heels and taking secret selfies while boating in Italy, staging paparazzi photos in the Hamptons and drink humblydrinking straight from the bottle at a suspected celibacy toast.
A scornful Leo gives you the impression that if you are foolish enough not to want them, they will warm the night with the heat of their heat and the eternal flame of their arrogance.
You know the next best thing to jumping on your ex’s grave?
He’s spending his birthday dancing at a Bruno Mars concert while looking cool AF in a crop top.
Make no mistake—that exposed shoulder is cool, folks.
The tune she chose to move to? “Marry you.”
Ironic? yes. Coincidence? Absolutely not.
Lions don’t do anything by chance, and to paraphrase Warren Beatty, they’re not really interested in living unless there’s an audience.
Further evidence of Lopez’s unrepentant Leoness? Doubling down on the brushoff commemorating Affleck’s birthday by posting throwback photos of it OWN birthday party in July.
petite? Perfect? A holy matrimony of the two?
In a world that demands we be less, Lopez’s extra is downright aspirational.
And because this broad is the lion to end all lions, said birthday party was ‘Brigerton’ themed and included a horse-drawn carriagea pre-dinner photo shoot, multiple outfit changes and a performance by Lopez herselfp.
Good lord – the self-centering is astounding.
All hail all Leos, who live to let you know they love themselves and that you’re a sloppy, hard-drinking, spiteful fool for choosing otherwise.
Loud, proud and defiant in a crop top, people. Bless and shout long.
Astrology 101: Your Guide to the Star
Astrologer Reda Wigle researches and reports irreverently on planetary configurations and their effect on each zodiac sign. Her horoscopes integrate history, poetry, pop culture and personal experience. To book a reading, visit her website.
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Image Source : nypost.com